Wednesday, November 4, 2009

What you don't know....

I hide things. All the time. I never dreamed being a mom was such a sneaky business. But it is. It could be that it is just me, I used to hide things as a teenager too, but then, it was for the same reason: I was the oldest, and there were children around.

I hide chocolate. I hide cookies. I hide granola bars, juice boxes and any thing else likely to be wanted for a specific purpose at a later date. It has become very hard to hide food from Jacob. My instinct is to put things up. But he is taller than I am, driven by insatiable hunger, and practiced. He has been finding what I hide for 15 years now.

I hide shock and surprise, disappointment and pain as needed.

I hide very little from Leslie, because she is an observant child, and it is almost impossible to accomplish.

I hide nothing from Nathan because it is unnecessary. He doesn't look for things. He thinks I hide things, but this is confusion, he just doesn't know where it goes.

I hide the TV cable when I think we have had enough for a while.

I hide Christmas and birthday gifts, and sometimes the wrapping paper for the gifts, so it will still exist when it is time to wrap presents. Small boys are drawn to wrapping paper rolls, they like to unroll and destroy the paper, and the gravy is playing swords with the cardboard tube.

I hide vegetables in my baking.

I hide things in my closet and my drawers. If you are one of my children, caught in my closet, you are dead meat, pounded with a mallet.

I hide the clothes kids have grown out of, but will be mad that they need to go to a new home. I take them out of the wash each time I fold clothes. I hide this from the children too. They do not know there is a pile named Confiscate.

I hide matches. I have four boys descended from a long line of pyromania.

Sometimes, I hide myself, in my room with the door locked, for a few minutes of quiet.

There are troubles with hiding things. One, is that around Christmas time, I can't find the clothes in my closet. Two, is the older I get, the more forgetful, and the more I have to hide surprise when I find something I forgot I had hidden. Three, is I am tired of this. At some point, I may give up on the mysteries. I may just buy you a gift, and hand it to you, what ever day I get it, and instruct you to remember what it is for and when. I may just open up and tell you when you've blown it, whatever the ramifications. I may learn to live in the moment so much, that I will never plan for a future meal or treat again, and just let them eat all 8 boxes of pop tarts, the minute I walk in from the grocery store. But I haven't done it yet.

My children are affected by this. If you find they grow up to be spies and detectives, you will know where the blame lies. They should be pretty good at it though. Wheedling into mom's secrets for years should be good practice.


Leslie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Leslie said...

We know much more than you think we do.

Natalie said...

I am too a hider. I HATE when I can't find something I have hid. I am not a good hider when it comes to things like my emotions though. You pretty much know how I am feeling when I am feeling it. Maybe if you have to give-up hiding something you should start with the emotions. It's not too bad to let it all out sometimes.:) I love your hiding list - it made me realize that somethings that I hide I didn't know I even hid.

AmyJo Denise said...

Hiding is not always bad. I can't see how it's bad to hide chocolate that is needed for rainy days and Mondays. I think we all hide something. Once my vocal coach told me that I hide behind my smile and my shyness. Which is true, but I think it's better to hide anger and frustration behind a smile, because that smile is infectious, and sometimes is the medicine needed for the pain. My parents always hide things too...sometimes finding them is good. It means I get a bowl of Cocoa Krispies before they disappear...and then if I put them back in the same spot...I might even get two! I think that hiding is good and bad. Because you can stow yourself away in the top shelf of the pantry, and hide behind a clone of that case you may lose yourself. However. C.S. Lewis said something along the lines of: when we lose ourselves we find ourselves.

Karma said...

Definately my favorite post ever!! As mothers we hide to protect, preserve, & reassure! It's what we do and I love you for pointing out all the hiding :) It made me cry a little (hormones & I am related to my mother)!! I think my closet must match yours; between all the baby stuff I am hording there and the beginings of Christmas - I already can't find my shoes!!

Sparverius said...

I loved this Jenny. Great post.

Crazy Uncle Ryan said...

I need to remember this stuff for when I have older children. Jenny, you are a great matser of mystery.