Depressing

What I really don't want to say here is that we are once again un-employed. But this is true. So we are back to looking for new work. This is three years in a row that we will spend February and probably some months following unemployed. Sigh.

Camp Tracy

Some of you will recall that Jacob worked at Camp Tracy with the Webelos Wilderness program this last summer. A few months ago, Jake mentioned that he would like to work at the camp again this winter. The next I heard about it, he had an interview! (Way to hustle, boy!) He was accepted to work with the cub scouts, and maybe a weekend with the boy scouts when they were really busy. He is two full years younger than the other staff members, so we understood this arrangement. However, after the first "busy" weekend, Leaders discovered that Jacob has some special qualifications that they like to take advantage of 1) He loves to be outdoors, rain, sleet, hail, Bring It On! 2) He has boundless energy. They can point to a mountain, say, "I want you to hike boys up and down that slope all day. " and Jake says, "Sure." and loves every minute of it. So he has been invited back for several weekends to work with the scout age boys. He has been working the rifle range in the evening and the snow-shoe and skiing trails all morning. He took these photos this weekend.

This is looking down on the camp from a snowshoe trail.Jacob told me that it is tradition for the scouts to retire a flag each weekend at the winter camp. The flag this weekend was a big one. In Jacob's words: "Only three groups of people can retire flags, Mom, the government, the U.S. Military, and the Boy Scouts of America. It took all of us to hold that flag, and my arm hurt from saluting before it was over. We salute the flag as it burns until no part of it is recognizable as a flag." I share this because it is so sweet to me that my son is learning about patriotism, and gets to participate in such a manner. As a mom, I am so grateful for scouting! It is an inspired program, providing needed guidance by dedicated men for growing boys. Marilyn Monroe may sing about diamonds being a girl's best friend, but for me, give me Eagle pins. I want what those boys have gained by the time they bestow that pin on their mother. I want it for all of my boys. It benefits all the people they associate with, all the time. Grow, boys, grow.

Camille's Birthday

Camille had her 12th birthday this week!! I can't believe how time flys! She made her own birthday cake, designed, baked and decorated. :) It is a garden theme, with chocolate cake to represent dirt, green frosting for grass, yellow "flowers" to hold the candles and gummi worms, you know, for worms.

This is Camille modeling a couple of presents. The pink apron is for her new found love of the kitchen and the cute blue hat was made for her by a girlfriend. Super sweet. She is really excited to join the young women's program. She played in her first basketball game last week and they won. :) Love you, sis! It is fun to watch you grow.

Macho Man

These are Seth's muscles. He loves to show them off, but if you ask to see his muscles, he will ask you to help him take off his shirt. This way you can truly appreciate these bad guys!!! Funny, adorable boy.

Dangerously Unbalanced Woman

Look closely at the woman in the corner. See her yawn?
See why?

Christmas vacation here was pretty crazy. You know the movie with Chevy Chase where the weird relatives come to visit? We ARE the weird relatives. We spent a lot of time in our Sunday clothes at the funeral, viewing and a family baptism, and just church. The rest of it, we pretty much spent in our jammies. We drank out of bowls alot. I have a bunch of cups, but everyone takes one to their bedroom and then comes back for another, and pretty soon, we are drinking out of bowls. Sigh. Then we take a safari into the bedrooms to find the cups. The wild animal noises are provided by children because I said we would have to CLEAN UP. These are the code words to signal the wild behavior, and loud wailing.

You know the mental and emotional steps you go through anytime you have to defer to someone? I do that constantly. There are enough people in this house, that compromise is the way we function. After I do this for two solid weeks for 7-8 other people, well, lets just say I'm a little crazy right now. I don't care what anyone else thinks, or wants or needs. Talk to the hand! It might have something to do with my Suburban being dirty. You know how you see cars that say "wash me" written in the dirt? Mine says e=mc2 (squared). Caleb keeps writing it. If they were to dig my Suburban up in an archeological site, they would find such layers of detritis that they would dedicate entire teams to deciphering our culture. My family room is a jungle, my laundry looks like Everest. I'm sure I'll get altitude sickness when I tackle that one.

What I am trying to say here, is I need a vacation from the vacation! Monday was back to school. Every one of my kids had an emotional melt down of some sort. So Tuesday was my turn. (We try to take shifts.) I left the kids with frozen pizza for dinner and ran away. Not far, maybe not far enough, but I am back today, and the laundry that I woke up certain to do yesterday is still sitting there. I have more command of myself today, the tic has subsided into a periodic twitch, so maybe it will get done.

I feel bad. I usually welcome the break and the noise and fun of having my kids all at home. I think it is the added sadness and emotional work of comforting everyone that has taken the real toll. It has been hard. I say it here, because I realized last night that I haven't taken opportunity to talk about it much. Nathan has been gone from home alot, to be with his family, which is as it should be. But I haven't talked at length with anyone about my own emotional struggles. Lucky you!

My sister gave me a tile for Christmas that says "The only normal around here is a setting on the washing machine." This is accurate. If you see me in the near future, and my car is clean, and I have my make-up on, congratulate me, for we will have found our new normal for a moment. :)

Christmas Came Just the Same

These are some photos from our nativity on Christmas Eve. The kids always love to dress up in whatever seems the thing at the moment.
Wise Men (ahem, Women)

I believe Jake was behind the camera, but he started the evening as Mary's donkey. I find I don't really have any good shots of Christmas morning. Things happen so fast, it is hard to tell what is going on! But Santa found us and we enjoyed ourselves. We spent a lot of time with family. We are glad to live close to Nathan's family. And I had visits in December from Shane's family, Natalie's family, my Uncle Duff and his family and a surprise visit from my mom and dad on New Year's eve. Thanks everyone, so nice to see you!

In Loving Memory...

Nathan's father, Stephen McAllister, passed away on Christmas Eve, early in the morning. A second heart attack proved too much for his diminished reserves. We are sad he is no longer physically with us. We are grateful for the comfort of the gospel. We are grateful for family and love and friendship. It has been a time of sweet reflection on Dad's life and on the beauty of the plan of salvation. Love you, Dad. We will miss you.